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Friday, July 1, 2011

When the parrots meet parrots.

A lady approaches her priest and says, "Father, I have a problem. I have two female talking parrots, but they only know how to say one thing."

"What do they say?" the priest inquires.

"They only know how to say, 'Hi, we're prostitutes. Want to have some fun?'"

"That's terrible," the priest exclaims, "but I have a solution to your problem. Bring your two female parrots over to my house, and I will put them with my two male talking parrots whom I taught to pray and read the bible. My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase, and your female parrots will learn to praise and worship."

"Thank you!" the woman responds.

The next day, the woman brings her female parrots to the priest's house. His two male parrots are holding rosary beads and praying in their cage. The lady puts her two female parrots in with the male parrots, and the female parrots say, "Hi, we're prostitutes, want to have some fun?"

One male parrot looks at the other male parrot and exclaims, "Put the beads away. Our prayers have been answered!"

Thursday, June 16, 2011

A word that start with "R"

The teacher was telling her 4th grade class about today's lesson.

"I'll say a letter of the alphabet and you give me a word that starts with that letter. Let's begin. A"

All the children raise their hands, but little Johnny was almost coming out of his seat trying to get picked. The teacher knew Johnny had a filthy mouth and thought to herself that if she picked Johnny, he would give her a word like 'ass' or '*******'. She picked Wendy, and Wendy said "apple".

"Very good", said the teacher, "now B".

Johnny was jumping out of his seat again, but the teacher picked Bobby. Bobby said "ball".

This went on and on with Johnny trying to get picked for each letter and the teacher knowing there was a dirty word for it. Then she got to "R". Nobody but Johnny had their hands up.

The teacher thought and thought and couldn't think of a bad word that started with "R". So she picked Johnny.

Johnny stands up and says: "R...Rat...a big, fat, ****in' Rat!"

Thursday, May 5, 2011

ChurpChurp



It's time to vote for the Cutest Thing!!

Churpie wants to thank you cuties out there for the overwhelming response for The Cutest Thing contest!

What's next? The voting, of course! You get to choose who shall be crown The Cutest Thing!

So what are you waiting for? Hurry start voting & get your friends to do the same too!

Share these awesome possum news today! Voting ends on Monday, June 13 2011.


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Get your 1st Android™ powered with 2.3 Gingerbread and only #Playstation™ certified smartphone with #SingTel.

http://www.churpchurp.com/raytan/share/singtel-xperiaplay2

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Holding The Baby

A woman got on a bus holding a baby. The bus driver said: "That's the ugliest baby I've ever seen." In a huff, the woman slammed her fare into the fare box and took an aisle seat near the rear of the bus. The man seated next to her sensed that she was agitated and asked her what was wrong.

"The bus driver insulted me," she fumed.

The man sympathized and said "Why, he's a public servant and shouldn't say things to insult passengers."

"You're right," she said. "I think I'll go back up there and give him a piece of my mind."

"That's a good idea," the man said. "Here, let me hold your monkey.

-About ME

DreamStage
Singapore

Name: Ray Tan, Age: 24, DOB: 14/09/1987, Diploma of Business Management.

ADD ME ah_liang1987@hotmail.com IN: MSN, E-Mail, Facebook, Friendster.

My Baby Bear
Lovely together for 5 years, still counting..

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